The UK is not a Catholic country; it is an irreligious one (thank God)

The least surprising news of the millennium is that Tony Blair has converted to Catholicism. For someone who didn’t “do God” he contrived to ensure that his approach to Catholicism was well-publicised. It’s a bit like Blair’s claim that he would not exploit his children for political purposes. Of course he didn’t, but then again…from the “Ewan test” for the Dome to that mug, he sort of did, didn’t he?

Meanwhile, following on Nick Clegg’s avowal of disbelief, the Mail on Sunday reports that only 8 members of the Labour Cabinet say they believe in God. Most of the others avoided the question. Those who said that they did not believe were David Miliband and Alan Johnson. Intriguingly, the more interesting answers were given by Tories. For example: “Patrick McLoughlin, the Tory Chief Whip, said: "I am a Christian – perhaps not a very good one. Do I believe in a single being called God? That is a slightly different question." What can he mean? Could he be saying that he believes in religion (because of what he believes to be its socially beneficent effects) but, of course, he is not so stupid as to actually believe in God? It isn’t clear that this is what he means, but if so it is an impeccably Conservative answer (it’s good if the plebs believe it, but me?, don’t be daft, old chap). He might of course be ruminating on the trinity (not a “single being” but a hat-trick); who can say?

The Telegraph reports that Britain has become a Catholic country. Well, not quite. There are 25 million who say they are “C of E” and only 4.2 million Catholics. But the Catholics are church-going and the Anglicans less so: 861,000 to 852,000 last year. It seems Catholicism has been boosted by EU migrants; all those “Polish plumbers”. Most of the “C of E” obviously do not hold very intense religious beliefs (thank the good Lord for that); so what the evidence really suggests is that the UK is an irreligious society.

Then again, a few years ago the survey evidence suggested that there were more atheists than Catholics (18% to 11% of the population according to a MORI poll in 2001); although “C of E” considerably outnumbered both. Atheists do, however, probably outnumber church-going Anglicans. So you could just as easily argue that the UK is becoming atheist. Of course, I realise this is not to compare like-with-like. Church-going is costly, in terms of time. Us atheists don’t have to go anywhere, prostrate ourselves on our belly, declare ourselves miserable sinners, and worship some omnipotent magnificence we’ve never seen. We can go to the pub instead.